Take me home please
Kelly's (S&R), 284 Bethnal Green Road
Season 2011-2012

ROUND 8
17.02.'12

played
eels (4)
pie (4)
mash (3)
afters (2)
liquor (1)
sum
total
CHRIS CHARALAMBOUS
8
2
6
4
1
3
49
365
TOM LEADER
5
4
2
3
0
3
36
193
NICK EVANS
8
1
2
1
1
1
18
163
MICHAEL GOLDWATER
5
2
3
2
1
3
31
104.5
EDWARD MOSSE
6
0
1
1
1
1
10
86.5
RICHARD LUCAS
4
0
3
1
0
1
16
68
ANDY POTTER
4
0
3
2
0
2
20
66
BRIAN CATCHPOLE
5
0
2
1
0
1
12
65
PETER HARVEY
1
0
9
6
0
3
57
57
LINDA HOLLIGAN
6
0
1
1
0
1
8
52.5
BEN HAYES
3
0
3
2
0
1
19
49
PAUL GRICE
3
           
38
LEN WILCOCK
1
           
38
DENISE ROUSE
3
1
2
1
0
1
16
36
JEAN O'REILLY
3
0
2
1
0
1
12
32
DAVID PEAD
2
1
2
1
1
1
18
30
PAUL GALE
1
           
29
IAN JENTLE
2
           
29
MIKE MILLARD
2
0
2
1
0
1
12
24
MONTY MARTIN
1
           
23
LUKE ROBERTS
1
           
20
MARVIN HARVEY
1
0
3
2
0
1
19
19
GRAHAM MACLAURIN
1
           
19
YURI NEMKOFF
1
           
16
RICHARD CARR
1
           
16
TERRY CECIL
1
           
16
SUE MADIGAN
2
0
1
1
0
1
8
16
JOHN O'DONOVAN
1
           
15
IAN SHERRATT
1
           
15
CHARLOTTE HARVEY
1
1
1
1
0
1
12
12
PETER RILEY
1
           
12
JASON SHARP
1
           
12
ALAN SMITH
1
           
12
JAMIE TANNER
1
           
11
MARY GREEN
1
           
10
LOUISA PENNELL
1
           
10
SHARON KANOLIK
1
           
9

The club was in Bethnal Green on 17th Feb for a spot of refection at S & R Kelly. As I snapped these hungry fellows at the counter I was reminded of the old adage 'One pie does not a luncheon make'.

Chris Charalambous was in relaxed and expansive mood, having just splashed out on this classic
p-n-m accessory. In fact all it needs is some well placed liquor splashes to complete the effect. Chris had also thoughtfully provided yours truly with a matching mug which now has pride of place on the Statto mantelpiece.

Jill the shop lady seemed to take our antics in her stride, despite having her quiet moment with the daily papers interrupted.

The fare was dominated by lashings of dark green liquor, which got liberally splattered about the shop on the short journey from counter to table.

It being St Valentine's week, hearts were worn on both sleeve and chest. Brian Catchpole sported a rugged yet romantic new transfer.

Linda Holligan and Jean O'Reilly started a lady's table on the other side of the dining room. It was clear that both had been tempted toward the light green end of the wardrobe spectrum that morning; could they be the 'Liquor Sisters'? Linda's grandson Stanley was six on the day, which meant she had just enough time to imbibe her regular 'one, one and one' before heading off to the festivities.

Farnham creatives Mike Millard and Dave Pead commuted in to add some sassiness to the proceedings. Commenting on the club's upcoming fixture in Dagenham, Dave quipped 'you don't have to be mad to go to Dagenham but it's a couple of stops beyond Barking'.

These two characters were present when the club last visited the premises some eight years ago in 2004 [see report here]. Age has not wearied them; thanks to a moderate yet steady diet of pie and mash, both look freshly woken from a VanWinkle-esque snooze.

Of course back in '04, Lucas was riding high at the top of the charts. Casting his eyes round a shop now brim-full of pie and mash clubbers, the ex-champ drily observed that there was virtually no room left for 'normal people'.

In 2004, pies were £1.10, mash was 60p and eels were £1.80; on average, prices have gone up by over 60% in the intervening eight years. Back in sepia days you could still get cartons of jellies for 6d and 1s. You'll notice that then, as now, the shiny metal pails formed a proud part of the window display.

Mirrors are a common feature of the traditional Pie Shop as the youngster in these pix was pleased to discover. We were glad to welcome back to the dinner table Charlotte Harvey and proud dad Pete after a ten-month absence.

Pete was keen to make up for lost time and stamp his own authority on the proceedings with an unprecedented nine pies. However his mighty effort is still 3 points shy of the official world record set by Chris Charalambous in Croydon. Could that have been the Bob Beamon Long Jump of Pie and Mash? As far as I know Croydon is not significantly above sea-level and there was no following wind in Cockney's that day.

I was the lucky recipient of the yellow wedge; the sole surviving slice of apple and cherry pie.

Sue Madigan was in feisty form this Friday but I can assure you that Pete Harvey's brother Marvin was not about to get his ears boxed.

Other desserters had to make do with the homemade bread pudding. Mike G is a resident of Edgware where there are no known outlets for his pie and mash passion. Hence his alternative moniker, 'Edge of Nowhere'.

Denise Rouse, denizen of Royal Berkhamsted, held court on the ladies' table after Linda's Holligan's departure. Unfortunately Jean O'Reilly's partner Ian could not attend the event, but she wanted to share a pic of the lad transporting his very own home-made meat and potato pie while they were on the road in the USA. Good heavens, it looks like an edible steering wheel!

Seasoned pro Tom Leader put in a tidy performance, thus keeping a firm grip on the silver medal position.

This talented young wisp managed to clean a plate nearly as big as herself, and in the reckoning were some carefully filleted eels courtesy of Tom Leader. For you see, Pete Harvey is not a fan of the fishy delicacy and this is where dad and daughter diverge. I asked the precocious Charlotte when would she be 4: 'On my birthday' was the concise reply.

Champions one and all.

I think I was as surprised as the shop staff by the turnout of 18 people on a normally quiet Friday lunchtime, but they coped with grace and good humour and even the heavyweights wanted for nought. And at this end of the Bethnal Green Road, we were perfectly placed for a post prandial meander around Brick Lane and environs.

'The Water Poet' in Folgate Street was our final destination; as luck would have it, a child-friendly venue which served a range of real ales to aid proper digestion.

Michael Goldwater takes issue with the the pub scales.

Views from the vicinity

Inside the new station at Shoreditch High Street

Sclater Street, approaching Brick Lane

Cheshire Street scrawls

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