Take me home please
Clark's, 46 Exmouth Market EC1
Season 2009-2010

ROUND 12
14.05.'10

played
eels (4)
pie (4)
mash (3)
afters (2)
liquor (1)
sum
total
DAVID ARKELL
10
1
2
2
0
2
20
303
NICK EVANS
12
1
3
1
0
1
20
247
LEN WILCOCK
5
           
181
JASON SHARP
9
           
140
TERRY CECIL
8
0
4
1
0
2
21
137
ANTHONY RUELLO
6
           
118
BEN HAYES
7
0
3
2
0
2
20
115
EDWARD MOSSE
9
0
2
1
0
1
12
102.5
RICHARD LUCAS
6
0
3
1.5
0
1
17.5
101.5
DOMINIC MATTOS
6
0
3
1
0
1
16
100
ANDY POTTER
6
0
3
1
0
2
17
94
PAUL GRICE
5
0
2
2
0
1
15
77
PETER RILEY
4
           
76
TOM LEADER
3
           
68
ALAN TERRY
4
67
LUKE ROBERTS
3
59
SCOTT CECIL
3
         
52
ALAN SMITH
4
1
1
1
0
1
12
48
JONATHAN PHILLIPS
3
47
TONY CHUNG
3
         
39
DANIEL BOUQUET
2
34
GRAHAM DARLOW
1
         
32
BOB HOLLINGSWORTH
2
30
JAMIE TANNER
2
0
3
1
0
1
16
26
THOMAS KRAFT
2
0
2
1
0
1
12
24
LEE MARCHANT
1
0
3
1.5
0
1
17.5
17.5
RICHARD CARR
1
0
3
1
0
1
16
16
TED BLAIR
1
15
JULIAN HITCHENS
1
         
15
UNCLE JIM
1
         
15
JOHN CUSHWAY
1
12
MICHAEL SAHRA
1
0
2
1
0
1
12
12
REHAN QAYOOM
1
12
JOE OLIVENNES
1
         
11.5
AUNTY JAN
1
         
11
CLAIRE COLLINS
1
0
1
1
0
1
8
8
JUDITH DESCHAMPS
1
         
8

Friday 14th May was the culminating day of the Pie and Mash League 2009-2010.

The rear upper deck of the 341 from Waterloo was inhabited by a bunch of hungry desperados bent on quelling their pangs with the food of the gods. The atmosphere was decidedly tense.

In spite of temptations galore on trendy Exmouth Market's gastro-strip, we were steadfast in our pursuit of England's finest stodge.

The ever affable and completely unflappable Pat was on hand to cater to our diverse requests, and we were presently boothed and ready to scoff.

Seated at the back of the dining room was this grizzly trio of Old Cassellians; [l-r] Alan 'Big Al' Smith, James 'Jet' Tanner and Richard 'Fingers' Carr. Trivia buffs might like to know that the Pie and Mash League is in fact a direct descendant of the Mighty Cassell Raiders Team of Publisher's Softball League fame. A historical 'curve ball' if you will.

Classic table-top action; the anointment of the upturned pie with chilli vinegar.

Smirking Cassell Old Boy Rikk Lucas was tucking in with his jacket firmly on. We wouldn't have it any other way. Tradition dictates the appearance of the Mister Pound Tie at season's end; a favourite with the club since the mid-90s.

There's Terry Cecil, unable to resist fidgeting with his gadget. For a change he had turned up an hour early on the right day. Notwithstanding penalty points for telephone calls it was a tidy season for Terence who finished fifth.

 

Prestonian accounts hero Paul Grice is on a mission to spread the Gospel according to Pie, and so we see here two acolytes from his Buzzacott office, Michael Sahra and Claire Collins, adding class and glamour to the proceedings. Well it's better than glass and clamour. Their lives will never be the same again, for they are indelibly marked with a 'touch of pie'.

Lee Marchant joined us for the first time and clearly savoured every lovin' spoonful. I could be wrong, but is he addressing the pie in the South London Style?

A familiar boatrace during recent campaigns is that of Andy Potter, but in spite of a 50% attendance record this season he wasn't quite able to break into the top ten, pie pickers.

After quite a long time, even the slowest of our combatants, Richard Lucas, rested his cutlery in the finishing position. As a tribute, I presented him with the 'After Hours' Award for unhurried degustation. [Actually, it was a film I wanted him to return to Daniel Bouquet.]

Last-minute arithmetic proved Edward Mosse to be this year's most consistent under-achiever. A 75% attendance rate and lightweight average of 11.38 were enough to secure a top ten league finish and triple figures, making this the hardest earned wooden spoon award. What vim the lad displayed this season!

Len Wilcock, the recipient of our Third Place Bib Award, was unable to be present, so here shown is James Tanner ably sporting said article. It suits him doesn't it? Len was having an operation on his hand which we hope will have him back behind his baby grand in no time at all, performing his favourite Goldberg Variations. Along with a wickedly fast red card on the football field. In a year of challenging obstacles, heroic Len amassed a huge average of 36.2.

Here is yours truly, with a 100% attendance record and still only managing the 'Second is Nowhere' Silver Mash Spoon Award.

At the season's end, my cockeyed prediction in Round 3 proved correct. I might have mispelled his name, but David Arkell did in fact prove to be the 'Arkle' of the Pie and Mash League, winning by several lengths after a modest start. Rising from debutant to champion in one term, plus breaking the triple century barrier are remarkable achievements. Well done Dave.

We haven't had one of these for a while. Yes, it's a Mystery Scoffer competition. A free p-n-m meal goes to the person who can name the lady worried by our lunchtime event. Email me with your proof.

We followed it up with a valedictory half at the Postman's Arms.

Our 2009-2010 campaign was ginormous, and best summed up by Churchill's famous words, 'Never have so many pies been eaten by so few'.

Be seeing you in 10-11.

St@.