Take me home please
Kelly's, 526 Roman Road E3
Season 2008-2009

ROUND 09
06.03.'09

played
eels (5)
pie (4)
mash (3)
afters (2)
liquor (1)
sum
total
NICK EVANS
9
1
2
2
0
1
20
174
LEN WILCOCK
4
119
TOM LEADER
3
           
94
TERRY CECIL
6
92
ANTHONY RUELLO
4
1
3
2
0
2
25
83
JASON SHARP
4
1
2
3
1
2
26-5=21
74
BEN HAYES
4
           
70
RON COX
3
65
ANDY POTTER
4
           
58
SCOTT CECIL
4
           
55
EDWARD MOSSE
4
           
45
JOHN LEACH
3
           
44
DENISE ROUSE
3
35
DAVID ROYALTON-KISCH
2
           
30
TED BATTS
3
           
28
GRAHAM DARLOW
1
           
28
RICHARD LUCAS
2
           
28
ALAN TERRY
2
           
28
ALAN SMITH
2
           
27
TONY CHUNG
2
           
24
THOMAS KRAFT
2
           
24
NICHOLAS KINGSTON-SMITH
1
           
17
JAMIE TANNER
1
           
16
CHRIS WALTER
1
15
DOUGLAS BENFORD
1
           
13
REHAN QAYOOM
1
8
TAMSIN EVANS
1
           
8
BEN HARVEY
1
           
8
ANTO MORRA
1
           
8
JACK MOSSE
1
           
8

There was a whiff of primavera in the early March chill as Club P-N-M made its first foray into the heart of Bow. G. Kelly's Noted Eel and Pie Shop is situated in the Roman Road Market Precinct as you might expect. Its gleaming fascia is complemented by the shiniest, tiliest interior I've ever dined in. Take your trunks and a towel for the full municipal experience, but be wary of the eel tank.

Once accustomed to the glare, I espied two rising stars of the League 2008–09, Messrs Sharp and Ruello, locked in a head-to head points duel. The Canary Wharf Wolfers are creating fireworks in the upper reaches of the table. Although Round 9 of the season was a modest 'mange a trois', it could prove pie-votal come season's end. Pie and Mash is all about being there.

The recently bewhiskered Mister Sharp provided excellent seafood anecdotes, one of them an homage to his Dad's way with smaller crustacea. Apparently you need a safety pin and 'winkle wrists'.

This is an aerial shot of my spread – note the generous oval platters ideally suited for the big scorer. To the right is Sharp's rhubarb crumble lurking menacingly beneath a yellow lava flow. It put me in mind of the Grand Prismatic Spring at Yellowstone. Now imagine a dessert that delivered an eye-fest like that; orange caramel strands, custard, liquor, and a blueberry centre would be my submission. Lloyd Grossman – cogitate on that! [You might want to blow on it first.]

Anyway by this time the lad was in all sorts of trouble as you can see from the desperate scatter of Ribena cartons. I had already dug him out of difficulty by finishing his last eel when he received an incoming call on his mobile. O dear, moins cinq.

As you can see there is a gallery of historical photographs.

[Right] Slippery business: along with the attributes of great concentration and lightning reflexes, protective goggles and a razor sharp cheese cutter are essential kit for the professional Eel-Wrangler. This should NOT be tried at home.

[Far right] Dinner lady from a pie-gone era.

These youngsters know how to keep young and beautiful, for they have quaffed at the fountain of youth every week for 47 years. It's the vitamins and minerals found in Traditional East End Liquor that keep their coats shiny, skin soft and supple, and noses moist.

Pies cooked here serve this shop and the other Kelly's at 600 Roman Road. The two premises, offering slightly different opening hours, in fact comprise one business.


[Right] An early car. Back in those days the business of P-N-M was a lucrative one, and the Kelly's were among the first to motor along the market . . . windows down, gramaphone blasting Ambrose and His Orchestra I like to think.

[Far right] Son of Bow in the sun of Bow.

Despite a Northerly nip at the nuts, it was a pleasant day for a flan through the posh backstreets betwixt Roman Road and Mile End.
I'd do it again.

St@
Governor,
The Pie and Mash Club